D3 body, D1 cock
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
