Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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