How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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