Duck Duck Cougar?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
