Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
