You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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