God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
