You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
