Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
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