WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
