I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
