He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
