If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
