So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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