My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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