One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
