sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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