i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Randomize