does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
