Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
