Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Houston, we have a squirter
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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