doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
We're not piercing ourselves today.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
