I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
