I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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