Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
