It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
She's the barista slut.
porn star boner night. come get it.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
