What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
