butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
