my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
