how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
How's work?
Spinning.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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