I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
he was CRYING into my vagina
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize