So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
