Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Moan for me like Helen Keller
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize