Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
We had to coat check the pizza.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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