so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
