Why are handjobs necessary in class?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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