Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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