I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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