I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Do vagina's smell?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
