This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize