Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
