Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
