oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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