buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He keeps bees of course he's weird
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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