I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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