why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
