I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
