I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
