..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
