Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
